On Saturday in the shower as my hair was literally jumping off my head I made the decision that it was time to have it shaved off. I knew there was just no way I was going to be able to take another shower like that and see yet another huge pile of hair.
We called Cian who does my hair, I didn't want anyone else to cut my hair. I didn't watch her cutting my hair off, I couldn't. I did cry, but not nearly as much as I thought I might. She did a great job, I have a very patchy buzz cut now. My hair is still jumping off my head, but it's not nearly as traumatic seeing the little hairs.
My mom said I was very brave, I'm not so sure about that. I suppose on some level it was my way of trying to take back some control over a situation I really have no control over at all.
It's very different, it's going to take some getting used to. I think Henry is doing better with it than I am. I'm surprised when I look in the mirror or see my shadow. He looks at me exactly the same way he did before. I'm very proud of him, he's such a sensitive soul.
I thought I'd be really brave and show you all my new haircut...
My next round of chemotherapy is the day after tomorrow. I'll let you all know how it goes.
1 comment:
You look beautiful. I am always thinking about you and Henry.
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